A SHOCKING DISCOVERY IN MANCHESTER!
Police in Manchester last night announced the discovery of an arms cache of 2,000 semi-automatic rifles with 250,000 rounds of ammunition, 10 anti-tank missiles, 4 grenade launchers, 20 tonnes of heroin, £50 million in forged UK banknotes and 25 trafficked Ukrainian prostitutes, all in a semi-detached house behind the Public Library in Moss Side. Local residents were stunned.
A community spokesman said: "We're deeply shocked. We never knew we had a library!"